Queens and Kings, Don’t Let a Duck, Clown or pimp Play You.
If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, It’s a duck!!! Isn’t it? Smiling and laughing right now? Me too! That’s the way I always understood that phrase. Well clearly, I needed some glasses or a new prescription. Because I saw this duck waddle up into my life, I saw all the duck movements and I definitely thought I heard a whole lot of quacking going on. You may be asking right about now “What the heck are you talking about Pamela J”? Why are you talking about ducks!?
My duck showed up in my life in the form of a tall, dark, handsome man who promised me the fantasy most every woman desires. He wanted to be the father of my children, swim the deepest oceans, climb the tallest mountains. Yes, I believed he loved me, would honor our relationship, and be faithful and dedicated to me and our child. But somewhere along the way I didn’t see the signs and the clues.
Have you ever wanted something or someone so badly and wanted it to be so real, that you did not see the signs, the clues, you didn’t hear the QUACKS?!?! Even though they were happening right in front of you? I understand because Well that was me. I thought I had been found by a beautiful relationship. A relationship that would finally honor me, appreciate me, that would make me feel respected. I just knew this relationship would appreciate and love and honor me and the child we had created until death did us part.
But I was wrong. Even when I realized what I was really looking at, it still took me some time to accept the truth. I needed to dig and search. Let me tell you something, If you seek, you WILL find. And I found confirmation that what I wanted to be real wasn’t real or true. I found those pictures in the trunk of his car. Those pictures of that road trip down south supposedly taken with his brothers to see family. Oh no! it was not his brothers in those pictures. It was Her. Have any of you ever come to a point in your life where something caused all your hopes and dreams to fall apart right in front of your eyes? A point where all your self-respect and happiness hit an all-time crash to the floor? Or maybe you felt like you had been run over by a Mack truck or freight train, but you lived to talk about it?
I took all those pictures cut them up in little pieces, put them on a dinner plate, covered them up with a dome, and sat them in front of him when we sat down for dinner that evening. He took that cover off and got to see that I now knew who he really was. All his infidelity sat staring us both in the face.
Wayne Dyer put it well: “If you change the way you look at things the things you look at change.” I had to change the way I was looking at this automaton duck situation in my life. It was not honoring, serving, or healthy for me and my child. I had to decide what now? I decided to end it then and there. I decided that I was not tolerating anyone’s nonsense like this. I decided I would never again knowingly allow someone to disrespect me, abuse me, physically or emotionally ever again.
Have you ever been there? That place where something has crept in or maybe is even trying to creep up into your life as we speak. It may or may not be my type of duck, but your duck could be a various health concerns, addiction, job, physical, mental, emotional challenge, abuse, money concerns or anything that may be causing you to second guess your self-worth and value. Sometimes you get to a point in life where you must decide to change the trajectory of your life. You must decide that you will no longer accept inferior treatment. That you will not allow issues or people to dictate your worth and happiness.
Yes, You and I are still works in progress. However, if we want to bring forth our greatness we must stay away from toxic situations and choose OQP, Only Quality People. We are greater than our circumstances.